#365. Mission Trip Souvenirs (or the sandals that prove you’ve been to Africa.)
Jul 30th by Jon
I wore a bowtie with suspenders to my eighth grade semi formal dance.
On paper or blog as it were, it would appear I was a pretty big dork in junior high. And I was to a degree, but I also had my cool moments. I mean sure the bowtie looked like Urkel from the show “Family Matters” but I was dating Sue Flannery, that’s right Sue Flannery with the freckles, and even as a young lad knew I had to brush the dirt off my shoulder like my man Jay-Z. The basketball thing didn’t phase me because we won the championship that year and I became that kid everybody cheers for like crazy when he gets in a game because they just want him to score at least one basket the entire year. And I beat the kid I wrestled that day and he cried so I didn’t mind that dozens of people had laughed at me in my underwear.
But for some reason, I am convinced my dad was trying to make me less cool as a teen.
For starters, he suggested I go back to school before I got my stitches out of my face after my horrible skateboard accident. If you didn’t “peg” or roll your pants the right way, you’d get mocked, so that face I was rocking after the accident would have been disastrous. Then there was the time our church brought in those traveling singers from Texas that tried to basically trick/trap teenagers into hearing the gospel at what was initially billed as a “fun singing and free pizza thing.” As the pastor’s son that did not go over well for me, although I admit, my dad cringes at that one too. But perhaps my greatest evidence that he didn’t want me to be cool was the hat he brought me back from a mission trip to an Eastern European country.
It was this big, furry mass of black that stood about two feet off my head. It looked like one of those hats that Cossacks wore in Russia back in the day. Had I worn it to the eighth grade, it would have served as a perfect target for spitballs, pencils and insults. And my dad seemed pretty shocked that I didn’t want to wear it. But I can’t blame him because I think there is this strange sensation that overcomes Christians that go on mission trips when it comes to souvenirs.
What usually happens is that about a week after you get home you put those things in a box under your bed. But I thought it would be interesting today to take a quick walk down mission trip memory lane, to get that box out and see what we’ve all put into it.
1. Art
Nothing says “I went on a mission trip” like a piece of tribal art hanging on the living room wall. It doesn’t matter that 98% of the house is decorated in rustic Americana antiques. There, in all its glory, is a dark wooden mask or giraffe proudly saying, “Yeah that’s right, I’m a giraffe. The rest of the house looks like Martha Stewart, but I don’t even care. I had to wrap this thing in dirty clothes and cradle it gently in my suitcase to even get it home without breaking it. You better believe this is hanging on my wall.” Eventually the husband or wife that did not go on the mission trip will move this art to a less popular room in your house, then to the guest bathroom and then to your garage. This is the migratory path most mission trip art takes.
2. The bowl or basket
I love these. Occasionally, you’ll go to a friend’s house for dinner and one of the items they serve will be in an oddly shaped bowl you’ve never seen before. “Oh this?” they’ll say casually, “We spent some time abroad on a mission trip.” And although it’s a lovely bowl or basket holding bread, you know all the other dishes in the cabinets hate it. “Look at the bowl. Handmade, brought from thousands of miles away. ‘I’m so fancy. Look at me and my earthen details. I have to be hand washed. Don’t drop me, I’m delicate.’ Punk bowl.” (Your cookware doesn’t talk? You don’t do this in your head? You should.)
3. Music
Before I realized how hip hop I am, I thought I might be reggae. I had heard “Mr. Loverman” by Shabba Ranks so I was clearly a connoisseur of the art. Therefore when our church went to Dominica which I think is one of the Lesser Antilles (that is such a fun thing to say, “Lesser Antilles”) I went into a music store. The clerk was probably laughing on the inside as I picked a bunch of reggae CDs and walked out thinking I was like Bob Marley but was in fact more like Snow of “the Informer” fame. But I envisioned me hanging out with friends and impressing them with the deep knowledge of authentic reggae I had gained while on a mission trip. I listened to the CDs twice. Everything was not “Irie.”
4. Hats
When I worked for Home Depot, toilet company Kohler gave us trucker hats that said “Bring it on” on the front. You can interpret that in your own way. I interpret it as gross. But that seems about par for the course when it comes to trucker hats which is fortunately not a trend that had infected the countries I went to on mission trips. Despite the lack of trucker hats though, you’ve got a lot of options when it comes to hats you can buy. If you’re a guy, it’s good to make a pact with a group of guys that you’ll always wear the woven wool hats you bought on that llama rescue mission you took to the Andes Mountains or the berets you picked up Paris or the fur “ushanka” you got in Russia.
5. Sandals
When we went to that island in the Lesser Antilles, such a delightful thing to say, we all got some rainbow colored, hard plastic sandals. I’m not sure that I have ever owned any other clothing items that are rainbow and hard plastic, but for those two weeks I refused to wear anything else on my feet. We all loved those sandals and were convinced that we would be wearing them the entire summer. But for some reason what works well on an island in the Caribbean doesn’t work as well in Central Massachusetts. They got put in a box pretty quickly but I swear if I still had them I would bust them out now, if only to frighten the much softer, much more comfortable Crocs sandals I see everywhere.
6. Weapons
As a sophomore in high school I didn’t have a whole lot of access to machetes. Until I went on mission trips that is. Suddenly, it was completely OK for me to buy a two foot long sword. What would have been confiscated by my parents if I brought it home from the hardware store down the street was suddenly cultural and even religious, because I bought it on a mission trip. Did I still cut myself with it and practice throwing it into the ground like some sort of adventurer with acne? Without a doubt. And if your question is “Is it true that when your wife goes out of town with the kids you carry around the Maasai warrior club your brother got you from Kenya for protection against the cat burglars you feel are lurking in your very safe, very quiet suburban neighborhood?” the answer is yes. But only because I’m a wuss with an active imagination.
I admit, there are two very obvious things missing from this list, mission trip t-shirts and bracelets. I felt like both of those items deserved their own posts and not just a shout out. But I stand by the rest of the list or rather I walk by the rest of the list when I park my car because most of my mission trip souvenirs have already been regulated to a box in the garage. I keep telling my wife that my machete needs to be easier to access, but she’s not having it.
Comments
5 machetes and counting!!!
They are very handy for yardwork–I gave one of them to my dad and he uses it fairly frequently. Also, now I finally have a way to open coconuts at home
Okay, I get it however, this may be a sign you are a little cynical. I am in a foreign country right now and you can bet I will have the green rug the local dignitary gave me on my floor. It will have a story, which I feel gives it meaning, at least to me. Personally, I prefer that to the generic Pottery Barn decor dominating America these days by people just trying to conform. I guess I’m a bit cynical myself
. Love the blog.
I went on an inner city mission trip once. I brought home a bag of crack. Somehow that did not work out so well.
Stacy -
Yet, one more reason you can’t be Steve Fee’s opening act. For shame Louisville, for shame.
Jon
My mother-in-law just got back from a mission trip to the Philippines, but to the best of my knowledge, she didn’t bring back and sandals, art, or hats. I’m beginning to suspect this whole “mission trip” thing was a scam, and the photos were staged in a local junkyard with rented children…
I went to Africa and brought home hepatitis.
And a bookmark.
Dear Jon,
Mind your own business! Don’t you have a blog to moderate, Pumas to buy, or somewhere else to hang out? Quit raining on my parade. I swear, I thought it was powerrrrded sugar.
STEVE FEE PICK MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
(see how that rhymes and all the capital letters…sometimes I amaze even myself)
All I got was a t-shirt
but then again we only went to Birmingham and I doubt my youth pastor’s wife would have let us teenagers run around with machetes, she would have had a heart attack… pity.
I have a mini-guitar/oversized-ukelele called a “cuatro” (named for it’s 4 strings) that I bought on a missions trip to Venezuela. I learned how to play it and everything! Figured it would be hanging prominently on a wall mount (like the mask), and I would play it every day until I die. I played it a lot for about a year. Now it resides in a case under my bed; a case that has made it through 2 (or 3) apartment moves without even being opened. I haven’t played it in YEARS!
I got the coolest switchblade when I was in Mexico. My youth leader had to show us how to hide them to get them back across the border. Because we were 14.
stacy,
can we be roomies at SCL camp?
want everyone you pass in an airport to know you went on a mission trip? easy, other than having jet lag written all over your face, add in some tribal drums. i was part of a mission trip to africa and we were those people walking around in the airports with tribal drums, some people even had 2 or 3. hardcore. others even pretended they knew how to actually drum on that thing and went on to annoy other travelers around us. poor man on one of our planes had to sit next to an oversized tribal drum on the way back home. “um, sorry sir, can we place this tribal drum all the way from uganda beside you because we are on our way home from africa and we have more drums than people with us. yeah, thanks.”
As an missionary kid I’ve been around the world–my personal favorites are the souvineirs that I have seen in the United States, South America, and most of Europe. All exactly the same. All sporting a “made in China” stamp if you turn it over. Doesn’t matter where I am, I always see things in the market stalls that I’ve seen on the other half of the world. In both places marketed as a “local” souvenir. And people buy them every time. I wonder what happens when these people meet.
“Yeah. I got that when I was building houses in Ecuador.”
“Really! I have one exactly like it that I got when I was holding orphans in Russia.”
Ha ha
All i ever bring back are the sad thoughts that those people will most likely never see me again… my presence is such a blessing to people.
dark thoughts… ohh and i usually try to get their equivelent to a butternut squash… its a personal challenge, every new place i go. You aught to practice sharading “butternut” before you go… else when you get there, they’ll bring you odd things like coconuts or cantalopes.
matty – salvadoran giardia!
i got the cousin, dominican giardia.
the red sox play a song @ fenway after every game, and the chorus says “i love that dirty water.”
but i guess only in an ethnocentric way.
From where I sit at my computer desk, I can see the hand-carved chess set from Kazakhstan (Ghengis Khan and the Mongel Lords vs. the Kazakhs) which hangs flat on the wall, balanced on the other side of the window by the backgammon set from Azerbaijan. I am reminded that I am glad I chose early on to only buy souvenirs that I knew I would want 20 years from the point of purchase.
So I have two wooden carved masks from Jamaica, a stuffed camel from Uzbekistan, a trio of little men playing instruments (from Turkmenistan), and just about the coolest hand painted nesting dolls from Russia. But my favorite??? It’s a toss up between my mink beret and my siberian white fox shopka (the big wooly hats) that I wear each winter.
I forgot the Persian rug….
In having such cool momentos, I am reminded daily of the mission trips – both short term and ones that lasted for years on the mission field – and blessings God bestowed upon me when I was younger.
I confess I have a rubbermaid tub in the basement with some not-so-cool momentos gathered before I had my epiphany that I needed to only buy what I would want in future decades. I just can’t get rid of the stuff!
bearcatprof
one of the kids in our youth group brought my husband back a large knife (almost a sword) in a leather holder…he loves it
and the other day at my mom’s house i found the purse i brought back from Peru…i might be cool enough to use that again!
my husband has a whip hanging in the garage (his toy room) as a keepsake from Africa. That whip has been the brunt of many jokes.
Nothing says ‘missions trip’ like a photo of you squeezing a poor African baby on Facebook!
Which leads me to wonder if sometimes people engage in ‘Christian poverty tourism’ rather than the great commission.
Hey, just puttin it out there.
I have all the trinkets that us peace corps volunteers bring back after 2 years in deepest darkest. It’s 20 years later now and only my soccer picture – me with my second division semi pro team in West Africa – is still allowed around the house. It’s funny.
Donna,
We can be roomies as long as you love pranking people as much as I do. When is SCL camp???
OUCH! I have everything you mentioned above. the one thing you didn’t mention is Bible in the language of the people you were visiting. The coolest one i have is in Hawaii Pidgin. Its called “Da Jesus Book” Check it out! Anyway… that hurts man, that really hurts!
I am late to comment , I am on vacation and was alerted to this topic. I went to Brazil with a certain parachurch group in 198-something. I brought home 3 or 4 spears, yes, SPEARS.
I did the best childrens stories.
Do not mess with me.
I went to Venezuela in college and I think I can beat some of these. I brought back a 8 ft long blowgun from the tribe we worked with as well as the darts for it. I also brought back a baby rattle made from monkey skulls, but never had the ‘nads to actually let any baby play with it. I also got a hammock I used to sleep in the next two years of college.
Cool thoughts about Mission Trips and the stuff people bring home, but I have nothing deep or spiritual to add, as I’m still stuck on the part about “pegging” pants. I’m 31 and was a MK (Missionary Kid), but during the pants-pegging phase, I lived in the Midwest. You must be about the same age as me, but where did you live? Was that a fashion faux pas felt throught the US?
Man, I’ve never been on a mission trip to a foreign country before.
I do agree that mission trip romances really need their own blog.
I was also thinking…Many people come back with authentic clothing from the country they went to. It seems a little silly to me. I guess it’s so they will have something cool to wear during Missions Week at school. I had a teacher that would randomly talk about her mission trip experiences and occasionally wear some kind of skirt thing.
And another thing, at school, we had these kids (Children of the World) come to chapel and sing for us and they had all these “made in wherever” merchandise. I’m not so sure where they were made but I bought one because it was pretty.
My French teacher in high school had this huge sword almost as tall as me and she used it to teach us fencing steps. I was so scared she was going to chop off somebody’s head.
Stacy, it’s okay. I wouldn’t know the difference either. But you called it “powerrrrded sugar” and yeah, I bet it had power alright.
All of the souvenirs my husband has gotten our kids have been broken by them. Bummer, but of course in those countries they don’t have big warning labels saying ‘don’t give this to your 2 year old.’
But he has gotten some quality mission trip shirts from his youthworks mission trips. They work with a company called ‘youth enterprise’ (yefonline.com) and their shirts are really creative. My favorite are the ‘one word’ shirts where there’s just one word on the front and a verse on the back. My husband was wearing his “Nonconformist” shirt when a liberal friend of mine said, ‘I never really thought of you as a nonconformist’ and then my hubby explained the verse on the back said, “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
But my all time favorite christian tee is “And they will know we are Christians by our tee-shirts.”
Last night my 16 year old son returned from a mission trip to Mexico. He gave my 14 year old daughter received a Mexican purse (very pretty) and my 6 year old daughter a hand made bracelet (also very pretty). He gave me a Mexican Wrestling Mask (black leather with a cross on the forehead, sort of like Christian Bondage gear) and my 8 year old son a whip.
Does that count as a weapon?
Prodigal Jon, you left off one very interesting souvenir;
The Illegal Souvenir
A few years ago I went on a mission trip to Cuba to teach at a seminary and Cuban church.
Almost my entire team decided to bring back cigars, even though it is illegal due to the embargo!
How’s that for a Christian witness?
I’ve been on a few mission trips – go me – and my souvenirs have never been quite this bad. I still use/enjoy looking at all of them, and some are from 8 years ago. (Wow, I feel old.) I have shirts, earrings, and small carvings. One necklace from Papua New Guinea has been hanging from my cars’ rearview mirrors for as long as I’ve had my own. I do have some bilums that I don’t often use, but that’s because they don’t have any inner pockets and they’re like 2 or 3 times the size of the usual tiny purses I carry, not because of their bright colors. I love them.
But maybe I’m just a better mission trip shopper than everyone else? *sticks nose in the air*
I’ve been to South Africa several times–no, not on missions trips, I kind of eschew the hugging-orphans-for-a-week-will-change-their-lives thing; I’m with the guy who’s skeptical about “Christian poverty tourism”–and I am proud to say that the only souvenir I have brought back is a photograph.
Of me.
At breakfast with Desmond Tutu.
Because I? Roll hard like that.
Shannon SO TOTALLY wins!!! How cool is THAT??
Seriously, and with all due respect, I raise my cup of tea to Shannon. Tutu is a world changer and you should be proud to have a chance to meet him. Very cool.
And Mr Stacy? I didn’t bring back hep, but I do suffer the consequences of eating some very questionable veggies. And the IDIOTS from The Group I Went With, who gave me serious guilt for “not eating what the poor people gave you!!” can kiss my…..
sooo soo true.
i’ve got the machete from el salvador, a ceramic piece from portugal. football jersey’s from england…
you’re spot on with this stuff! it’s so therapeutic to read
Hmm. Our coach enforced a rule of spandex shorts when we weighed in. Mostly this was because they were better looking and weighed less than tighty-whiteys, but also because they accentuated my then magnificent quads.
Jon,
I just had to tell you that Jeff (pastor) quoted SCL during his lesson yesterday. Of all the deep, thoughtful insights he could have cited from, do you know what he said?….
“Punk bowl.”
And it was truly awesome…
Yup, just got back from Uganda.
I think I have committed all of these offenses.
And I am still wearing my bracelet that one of the church women gave me…..maybe one day I’ll take it off?
Maybe….
South Korea has these ten dollar handbag shops all over the place and I have been teaching English here for 11 months…but I'm not buying any art or chopsticks, I swear!
Just followed the link here from today's post as I didn't realized you'd posted about this (musta been before my time).
My husband TOTALLY has a mission trip machete! Even better: his mom bought it for him on HER trip! Sweet.
My bother and I both the sons of a pastor, have two Chinese swords, a Nicaraguan slingshot, and two whips from Kazakhstan. I can't wait to see what I get this summer.
Mmm…is there going to be a post about people who go abroad for study or pleasure, bring back artifacts (exactly as described above), and then get the evil eye at church when they confess it WASN'T a mission trip?
Because that has happened to me multiple times. And the 'have you ever thought of missions?' question gets a lot of airplay, too. I'll put away my cool ethnic jewelry and Havaianas sandals just to avoid the questions!
My husband just returned from his first mission trip (Haiti) and in comparison did very well with his mission trip purchases.
He followed the mantra I've repeated to him over the years- when in doubt, buy jewelry.
My daughter (who's going on a mission trip to Jamaica – YES, Jamaica!) this weekend…just ROFL'd
nice reference to 'Snow.'
“Look at the bowl. Handmade, brought from thousands of miles away. ‘I’m so fancy. Look at me and my earthen details. I have to be hand washed. Don’t drop me, I’m delicate.’ Punk bowl.”
LOL!
FUNNIEST THING I HAVE HEARD THIS YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I grew up in Ecuador and have seen dozens of short term teams come and go. The most common souvenirs from my country are teddy bears made out of llama fur that I am 97% sure always carry lice; wool sweaters that my family now refer to as "belly busters" because of their tendency to shrink after one wash; cross-shoulder bags made out of Andean prints (which also serve as handy indicators of gringos who are trying to fit in); and, of course, machetes or, inexplicably, rainsticks.
And, during my sixteen years in residence in Ecuador, I was the proud owner of all of the above.
Love it! I am sitting here here within arms reach to two souvenirs from many missions trip. While everyone else gets key chains, bookmarks, picture frames or letter openers; I can usually find something that fits with my decor – somehow. In Senegal, I found this charming candle holder that is kinda shabby chic. Love it! Wish they had more matching pieces in that pottery shop. Sigh~ My earrings from Turkey – love them! Though I don't wear the scarf, I did use up all of my cinnamon from the Turkish bazaar…or did I?
[...] trip sandals, something I’ve chronicled before, come in two varieties: woven and rubber. The woven ones appear to made of some sort of rope and [...]
[...] trip sandals, something I’ve chronicled before, come in two varieties: woven and rubber. The woven ones appear to made of some sort of rope and [...]
just got back from paris and justified buying an expensive parisian purse with "well everytime ppl compliment me on it, i can tell them about the trip and how God moved and eventually the gospel. God wants me to buy this purse. it's a tool for sharing the gospel!!"