#160. The bait and switch.
Apr 18th by JonIf you lived in Hudson, Massachusetts during the early 90s, the phrase “Pizza Blast” strikes either rage or regret into your heart. If you didn’t, you’re about to hear my favorite story of us Christians pulling the “bait and switch” move to disastrous results.
My dad, the honorable Reverend Acuff, cleared me to tell this story. Which was surprising, given what happened. I’m not even sure where to start. Maybe in Texas.
A youth group choir from Texas agreed to come to my small town and sing some songs at the local public high school. I forget their name, it was something like “Fresh Wind” or “High Notes” or “Aspire Higher.” It was a name that upon first glance didn’t scream, “sweet baby Jesus.” Which should have been our first sign but at first everything was great. They killed in the assembly they did at the 9 high schools our church put them in. My dad would later claim it was their performance of Gloria Estefan’s “The Rhythm is Gonna Get Ya” in which they used whistles that convinced him to invite this group but I never saw any whistles. They sang a bunch of Beach Boys songs (which sounds dumb but bear in mind at the time the country was intoxicated on their song, “Kokomo”) and kids loved it. Plus, since they were from Texas, they were attractive. (I can’t prove it, but I think 87% of people from Texas are attractive.)
The culmination of their visit was a Friday night performance we were calling “The Pizza Blast.” It was going to be great. We made t-shirts with that mandatory youth group illustration of teens pushing and leaning against gigantic letters that spell out the name of your event. My dad was a hero. The mayor told my dad, “My daughter loved the assembly. She can’t wait for the Friday night concert.” The mayor’s daughter should have waited, we all should have waited.
After opening up with some clean secular songs, the choir started slowly working in some God songs. It was completely unexpected, like some sort of Sandi Patty drive by. I’m sure at this point my dad started getting sweaty. I am sure he smelled a bait and switch coming. But we were young then, innocent and wide eyed. How where we to know the choir staff was going to shut all the doors to the auditorium and post guards to discourage anyone from leaving? How where we to know a very direct altar call, a “church sleeper hold,” was about to be applied to the unsuspecting crowd? We couldn’t.
It was in the paper. People briefly hated my dad. The mayor was horrified. The ACLU was notified. Kids and parents alike were probably set back about 18 months in their trust of God and church and Christians. I kept the t-shirt.
I tell this story because sometimes we’re still tempted to do this and I don’t want to. The other day a friend unfamiliar with my blog told me, “yeah but you’re just bashing the church. It’s like showing a movie before youth group. As soon as you introduce Jesus, no one is going to come to the site.”
I think he was wrong, but if I have been foggy or weird about where I am coming from then I apologize. I love Jesus. He’s the most important thing in my life and the reason I ever wrote a single word of this. I don’t think I pulled a bait and switch with this site, but there it is. I’m cool with God and he’s cool with me.
p.s. The reason most bait and switch scenarios happen isn’t trickery. It’s because churches have a hard time making the transition between the concept (free pizza) and the core idea (Jesus died for you.) I write church advertising, not an oxymoron, and one the biggest things I focus on is creating strong, transparent “bridges” between the concept and the core idea.
Comments
This concept also works on mission trips. They make you think you are going to go do lots of work for needy people in the area you are visiting, and maybe get to have some good conversations about God, and then you get there and spend the whole time running errands for missionaries there. And then they make you feel bad for not wanting to do it, because a good Christian would serve in any way they can. And they are right, I should be able to serve… Just don’t con me into coming on your trip- be honest with me about what the trip is really going to be like!
Once again I’m literally laughing out loud because I can relate. I totally remember the “pizza blasts” of the late 80s/early 90s. Of course I was in “The Bible Belt” so there was no ACLU involved…just some bitter rednecks.
Being in Texas now, I’m not sure about your statistic, but I have gotten more attractive since I moved here, so maybe there is something to that.
Yes, churches love this. I drove by one recently that was advertising “Life According to Jim”–and in small print that it was a study of James. First off, I can’t imagine that anyone would be hooked by a lame show like that. Secondly, why couldn’t they just be upfront with something like, “Come study the book of James and learn how to shut up and not alienate everyone you know?” I would totally be on board for something like that.
I hesitate to say this, but I think bait and switch happens because we try to sell Jesus rather than model him. I think you hit on that concept earlier.
I’ve never seen your blog as anything but a guy being real about his faith…which is what the world needs to see.
I’m not sure if you’ve written about this, but Christians love Compassion. You know, the group who scares you with stats and pictures of starving kids around the world and they try to guilt you into sponsoring one. Yeah, those guys. They’re great, but I get the feeling that they do the ole bait and switch all the time. They come and speak at your church or school or wherever, have a nice talk about Jesus and his love for ALL people. Then real subtly they hit you with a scripture or two that shows his “heart for the poor.” When that hits, you know what’s comin’…the emotional teasing powerpoint…you know the one.
“If you feel led to sponsor a child, our table is out back. For only $32 a month, you could send a kid to school and feed him.”
PS – I love Compassion and all they do, but I think “hoosier reborn” got it right when we try to sell these things rather than model them.
PSS – Jon, I love the site and I’m impressed that with each post your writing becomes more and more polished and funny. Keep it up man!
very good point here. as a Christian, i get annoyed with this and don’t want to be present at the event any longer and find myself getting an attitude for said reasons. i can only imagine how someone that doesn’t know Christ feels.
this isn’t a bait and switch blog. you were real from the very first post as to why you were doing it. no one should feel that way coming here.
keep ‘em coming. they brighten my day.
Reminds me of old high school Winter Camp promo flyers showing nothing but snow play. However, the snow-to-sermon ratio never quite broke 20%.
As long as head count remains a metric for success, the bait and switch will endure.
This should have been #1. I can’t tell you how many concerts, movie nights, etc. I have attended that weren’t exactly as advertised.
The absolute WORST was when my boss invited me out on a Sunday morning to see his kid in a Christmas play. (I was part of a church plant that met on Saturday nights, so I had Sunday morning free.) I went, you know, because he’s my boss. So there was the cute play, about 45 minutes, about 20 minutes too long… and then the pastor gets up and thanks everyone for coming. My husband and I were ready to get out of there, when praise and worship started. 5 songs. Then an offering, 45-minute message, alter call… a full-blown church service AFTER the play! I was livid. I was also on the 2nd row and didn’t feel like I could just get up and walk out.
I felt tricked, cheated, lied to… and I love Jesus. I can’t imagine how the friends or family members felt. Awful.
Great illustration…thanks for sharing it. Makes one think about our approach
We pull bait and switches, because we fear rejection. If we tell someone, hey I want to share my faith with you or come with me to church, we fear they’ll automatically say no. And they might. But guess what? Rejection is part of this walk. People reject Christ all day, every day. WE reject Christ all day, every day. We just gotta learn how to pick up our crosses go with it and if someone tells us they don’t want to come with us to wherever we’re going, we gotta shake that dust off our feet and keep on moving … moving, moving forward (Sorry, I had to throw that in there).
Jmack, I work for Compassion and I can’t tell you how much it breaks my heart that you feel that we do a bait and switch when we present our mission. Would you be willing to talk to me about it? if that is EVER the way we come across then something needs to be done.
julisa@gmail.com
Just wanted to say I love your blog. Just started reading it a couple of days ago, but I look forward to each day with anticipation. I have always been around church (I’m 33 yrs old now) and the things you talk about just crack me up. Keep up the great posts!
If you can’t laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?!!
The term the old-school Southern Baptist preacher of my childhood used was “Dog and Pony Show.” As much as he would be accused of being irrelevant in most of today’s churches, I think he was right. Jesus said that He would draw all men to Himself if we would lift Him up. I don’t really see why we think free pizza and ambiguous church names are going to do a better job than Jesus Himself.
What about the Impact World Tour? I don’t know how much of a world tour that was, but when they came to New Zealand, they basically did skateboarding and hip-hop and brought in the Jesus stuff at the end. It really makes me uncomfortable. It’s like “Hey we’re hip, look at us, we’re just like you! Now that we have your confidence, let’s try to convert you!”
So many times I think we love people just so we can convert them. I think as Christians we should love people unconditionally, without expecting anything in return. How would you feel if you found out the only reason your flatmates (room-mates in American speak?) ever wanted to live with you was so that they could convert you to their point of view? You would not feel loved.
Just wanted to say that I think it’s very clear that you not only love the Lord but also have quite a soft spot for the church. No bait-and-switch here!
so my new author friend, Nancy Rue, and I were listening as two other friends read this blog from my iphone… and we can’t get enough. we want a book, asap, that we can buy and give to everyone we know. get on that would you!
Oh man. Our youth group wasn’t TOO bad about this but anytime I heard “invite your friends”, I knew it was doom! I was a cynical enough kid to avoid those Pizza Blasts. Also, I had no friends.
(also, no bait and switch in this blog. I know exactly where you’re coming from.)
I attended many a “pizza blast” in my day. I also rounded up 10-15 of my friends and took them to our church for the “free” pizza. Then, of course, they all rededicated their lives and we were all on fire for the next 24-48 hours. Ah, the memories. Love. Your. Blog. And, no you are very real.
yeah, i Saw someone say: “[the church tries] to sell Jesus rather than model him.” I completely agree. A big issue I see is that people aren’t really experiencing God themselves. They feel, out of obligation, that they have to tell people about him because of the great commission. But because they themselves aren’t really excited about Jesus, people don’t see what’s so awesome about Jesus, and so the church has to sell Jesus like a product. So the solution? Get people excited about Jesus!!
On another note, I don’t think you’re bashing the church for bashing’s sake. I think you’re pointing out humorous quirks/issues within the church that need to be addressed sometimes =]. I enjoy it
I really enjoy this blog, and I think you’re very real. My only complaint is that the first time I visited (I followed a link from Crummy Church Signs), and was a little confused. I was expecting some kinda obvious text on the sidebar or something explaining the purpose of the blog (whether it’s a person being honest about their faith, or a person being snarky about others’ faith). I had to visit several times and dig a little to figure it out. But now that I have, I freaking LOVE it! XD
You said where when you should have said were. I’m not normally a grammar nazi but you did it twice in a roll and it made me twitch the second time through.
I’m sorry…I couldn’t continue reading after the 87% of Texans being attractive comment. If only that were true. If only I didn’t live in a state full of people who never conquered the skill of cicular motion while brushing one’s teeth. Leave the big cities, and you discover that Texas is eerily similar to the Panhandle of Florida. And I can say that with all honesty, because my family comes from the longest, curliest, thickest armpit hair in the armpit that is North Florida.
The reason we do the bait and switch is that we (those of us who call ourselves Christians) don’t think the product we are offering is good enough to stand on it’s own.
Why do pizza places have nice beautiful pizza commercials, with lots and lots of delicious stringy cheese, yet when you order a pizza, the toppings are casually thrown on, and not enough cheese and the toppings don’t even go to the edge. We order pizza knowing we are not getting the beautiful advertisement pizza. We know the 17 year old kid who made it had no passion in the creation he made for us, and it was just another inconvenience to have to make another stupid pizza for another stupid customer. Yet we buy them because we dream of someday getting the beautiful pizza with more than adequate cheese blessing. And the advertising made sucked us in for another round. (That and even passionless pizza is pretty tasty)
Yet with Jesus, our advertisement will always be infinitively less that who he really is, and what he really is. Yet we still seem to think we need to offer a “free car” to get people to come to church.
If the Christians of today actually believed what we possess for Eternity was truly worth offering to those all around us… the bait and switch would look even more ridiculous. If we lived Jesus in our lives and reflected just a small portion of Him, we would have no need of the bait and switch.
In my own life, so often I have a chance plopped in front of me to share Jesus with someone, and I pass it up and change the subject, and then begin thinking of some trickery to get that same person to come to my church…
The only reason I am commenting on this post is because I see a distinct lack of Power Team.
I completely agree that the ol’ bait and switch frustrates people and happens altogether too often, but it seems to me that a lot of the time, it’s an accident. A youth group wants to show teens “Hey, you can be a Christian and still have fun. Come hang out with us and see!” So they come up with a fun event but want to make sure that “the message” doesn’t get lost in the course of the evening.
Bam.
Unintentional bait and switch.
I'm a Texan and I approve this message. We are smashingly attractive. Cherrio!
The bait and switch is the biggest turnoff ever. I remember when I was in college the local chapter of Campus Crusade would offer coupons for free pizza if you filled out a survey. Most of the questions in the survey were about how happy you were, with a few Jesus questions thrown into the mix. The last question was whether you'd like a visit from a Cru representative to talk about Christianity. I checked the "no" box. So imagine my surprise when I was eating my free pizza in my dorm room, and these two student missionaries show up. To make matters worse, they zeroed in on my Catholic roommate and spent half an hour pestering him about why he couldn't join the "right" church. That experience put me off Christianity for years.
I am involved with Campus Crusade as I right this and THIS IS STILL GOING ON!!! Why have these experiences continued? People in our ministry talk about how we dont like to do it, participate in it, support it and yet, some how, it still occurs.
I'm from Texas! Woot!
yeah you need to bait, but then work in the gospel without a 'switch'. like you said, transparent bridges. good stuff, bro