SCL

Something cool to think about…or rather intimidating…in the book of Ephesians when the Bible talks about the armor of God, nothing is listed to protect your back. We were never meant to retreat from battle.

The phrase “warrior poet” is used a lot in our community. I wonder if David was wearing dog tags when he danced naked before the ark of the covenant entering Jerusalem? I’m sure he was eating mutton jerky while writing what we call Psalms in his spiritual journal.

Good stuff.

When I was a teen in the 80′s, some friends and thought we would start a Petra-esk Christian rock group. The name … 77th Armored. We were cool.

Just found your site from Boomama.

Jon this is good stuff, thanks for totally stealing this idea from Stuff White People Like.

I can identify with almost all of it, and I like your take on most it. I was expecting you to be more sarcastic (like I am) and be very negative. But I am pleasantly surprised to see you are actually very respectful in your treatment of this stuff. (that comment is NOT sarcasm, I really mean it)

Keep up the good work.

I promise you, this is like stumbling across my life in blog form. I love it. I’m totally adding you to my blog list!

I’ll never stop watching the Hills!

i’ve led worship at some men’s gatherings. in my experience, there are usually in the form of a “wild game banquet,” where they serve stuff like possum and kangaroo, and generally have some sort of ex-football player or coach as the speaker, which means they tell a bunch of stories about their glory days, and then tie it together with some bible verses to get all the men pumped up about” fighting the fight” or “running the race” or something.

the men usually enter the church decked out in their camoflage and fishing vests and hats. and then they always reserve a table in the very front for the worship band, who sit there with our long hair and girls’ jeans, trying to count how many of the hunters it looks like probably think we’re gay…
so my question is, even though we don’t play football o own guns, we get to consider ourselves men, right?

(oh yeah, at the last “wild game” event, i chose to use a drummer who is a vegetarian. that cracked me up…)

Thou shalt not kill.

This reminds me of when all the rage was having ex-wrestlers who are now Christians come speak to your group. This happened multiple times while I was a youth. I don’t like wrestling, I’m not into roughing it so I never found much interest. It’s like their saying “If you are a guy I’m sure these will pump you up for Jesus”

Maybe I’m a guy who’s into Origami. Where is my special speaker?

I think this is the funniest blog I have ever read.

I linked it to my own, so you should gain like two more people to your readership.

this also reminds me of the “Power Team” Remember those guys?

I went to see them when I was 12, my dad took us. They were HUGE weight lifter guys and to convince you to accept Jesus into your heart they would tear phone books in half and carry refrigerators on their backs. “I going to blow-up this hot water bag and if the air goes back into my lungs – my lungs will explode and I’ll die – You better accept Jesus into your heart or all this air will go into my lungs and I’ll die.” Good thing I accepted Christ – I like to think that single act saved the lives of weightlifters around the world.

something christians like:

blaming the devil for EVERYTHING

Christians love the Power Team, too! You know, the weight lifters (who have never taken steriods, of course!) ripping phone books in two, breaking baseball bats over their heads, and bending frying pans with their legs like a thigh-master, all while screaming “I can do all things through Christ strengthens me!”

Love your enemies & turn the other cheek.

Oh! And we cannot forget the Power Team – a true blend of muscle-bound militant warriors with a little of the wrestler thrown in with those hair cuts and body suits!

Though, they may deserve their very own number, so unique were they!

This blog is the best blog in the history of the america’s. And the wal-marts.

Sorry, I just love adding a “the” to everything to make it sound a bit more country.

Anyway – keep up the awesomenocity. You should probably write one about Halo tournaments at church.

“Sniping your head off at 200 yards in the name of fellowship” lol. I kid because I’ve organized them.

btw, CoD4 is better.

I think the people who organize these things have never actually been in the military. As the wife of a marine, I’m sure the guys bond (my husband just has a desk job, so maybe it’s different in the units that actually see combat) but it’s not exactly in a godly manner. I’m very proud of my husband and I must say that for all their roughness, military families make amazing sacrifices for this country, and I think they deserve all the benefits and respect we can give them. I wish more men had this experience, but it does try your faith terribly.

Have you ever watched Dog the Bounty Hunter? Now THERE’S a bad a** Christian man. http://www.dogthebountyhunter.com

I remember the Power Team! This blog is like waking up from a bad dream…only it really happened. First Psalty, then the Power Team… what’s next, Sandy Patty?

Man, I can’t help but think of Carmen! Not sure why, I just do. Christians also like, well maybe just liked, him.

Anon (3:58): I went to one of these things one time! It was great. Lots of new meat I’d never eaten before and oh so tasty!

Kind of going along with this theme has got to be the Royal Rangers! For the longest time it was strictly an Assembly of God organization, but has since branched out to anyone who wants it. Here in the US its men and boys only. It’s basically AWANA and the Boy Scouts mushed together (as my dad explained to a co-worker – Bible-Thumper Boy Scouts). Learned all my outdoorsie stuff from them. An amazing program that I wish I was still a part of.

Being an Army wife, I have to second what Helen said. I know my husband has had some very trying times just within the FOB while deployed!
-Mrs. G.

Gud Gawd, thank you for writing this. Who was it, (Promise Keepers?), that had men on swords with horses drawn a few years back?

I’ve been working in men’s work and specifically working with adolescent boys for years in various ministries. Got another big “boys” workshop coming up in Houston in June.

There is no end to the warrior, fighting, racing, sports analogies for men’s ministries. All that is good for recreation events, but for a model of ministry? Yikes. So how do why do we keep promoting the God of the Old Testament without the filter of the New Testament in the person of Jesus Christ?

Old Testament: Your neighbor slaps you? The you blow your horns, tear down the walls of their city and circumcise all the men and boys. That’ll teach ‘em. In the New Testament, you turn the other cheek and give your cloak as well. Even with that, we have to make cheek-turning into some type of macho thing- with your adversary unable to slap you silly ‘cuz of some physics explanation about the way you slap people. I’ve seen pastors do whole sermons about the mechanics of slapping for that verse. Puh. Leeze.

And, even if the Men’s Group has a open-to-intepretation title like, “Sons of Thuder(dome)” the men’s ministry is still usually all about doing things: paint the bus, paint the office, drive the bus, build an office, cook the food at the BBQ luncheon, buy the beer, clean up the parking lot. Just more doing. “Look at me Papa God, I’m a good, busy little boy!”

How about just being the sons of the Father? Yikes. So many men had such messed up relationships with Dad that the idea of just being loved and in love with the Father has escaped us. “Maybe if I mow the lawn one more time, Dad will like me.” The prodigal son comes home and there’s no proving, no doing, no swords, no plowshares. Just love, relief and coming home.

But, there was a BBQ.

Great article.

PS: I did know a young man who at 14 came to Jesus because of the buff-like antics of The Power Team. Go figure.

You mean I missed the men on swords with horses drawn fad? Aw man! Why do I have to miss all the good Christian stuff? Wait…what?

It seriously seems like we don’t fail enough. There’s enough of a ‘battle’ within the confines of your own four walls that somehow we need to go out and be all tough and pretend like we’re fighting something.

It’s one of the main reasons I’ve never gone to a promise keepers (I’m a gen-xer through and through)–I’ve got enough to occupy my time rather than going to an event that props up a stereotypical view of what a man should be.

The real question is as Christians men why are we so crazy about war, and battles? It seems to me the message of the Gospel should be of peace and love yet all we focus on is the battles of the OT.
I personally hate war and any life that is lost and i’m really tired of all the Christian men groups that focus on those themes.

The Power Team..YES! I kind of wish they were still around. I wouldn’t mind seeing some cement get smashed on stage at church again!

Actually, the Greek word that is used in Ephesians for “breastplate” is “thorax.” This word is used today in the medical world. It still means the same thing today it meant then… and encompasses the cavity enclosed by the ribs, breastbone, and dorsal vertebrae. You see, Paul’s original audience understood the “breastplate of righteousness” to protect the entire area below the neck and above the pelvis, front and back. PS. Jesus often “retreated” to spend time in prayer and to avoid “militaristic” conflicts.

Ok, this is funny. I actually have chick blog called Stiletto Army. It’s more for chick bible study, but still, we can kick some boo-tay in a stiletto.

Ok, I can’t help but comment on this one. Let me start with the fact that I work for The Salvation Army – “we’re more than just a thrift store” (no seriously, it’s a denomination). Anywho, The Salvation Army is pretty much a denomination based on war/military themes. We call our pastors “captains, majors, commissioners…” Our retreats and meetings are “councils” we even have a monthly publication called “warcry.” It’s all too overwhelming sometimes, but I just thought I should give some “War-themed ministries” some Salvation Army love.

I personally find nothing more horrifying than the use of war analogies in Christianity, especially in children’s ministries.

I mean, beyond the obvious consistency problems between this and “turn the other cheek” or “do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly,” the very concept that we still use crusade language in a world in which so many spend so much time talking about “those evil others” who “don’t value human life” and “seek to spread their religion by the sword.” Turn your cheek into a book, please.

War-themed Christianity sends kind of a mixed message I think. War analogies are fine, so long as you’re not trying to appeal to the more primal and aggressive nature of men. How do you transition from “Armor of God” and “Spiritual Warfare” (HOORAH!) to “Loving your enemy”?

Every time I hear about a Christian man being given a William Wallace sword I start giggling inside. I mean, do they not realize that they’re basically passing around a symbolic phallus? And what the heck is one supposed to do with such a thing? Displaying it on the mantle seems to kind of defeat the message behind it. Do all these guys get together and wield their swords or something? That just makes me giggle more.

I’m thankful that when I left home, my dad gave me USEFUL tools. (Oh, and I’m a girl.)

Once I went to a church where the men’s ministry logo was a cross that turned into a dagger at the bottom. Yikes.

Another similar theme is the spiritual warfare/gangland warfare found in “christian” hip hop (i use angry quotes because christian is suppose to be a noun signifying one who follows Christ not an adjective meaning doesn’t swear). Cool songs like Mobbin’ with Unity and Shoot’em Up (refering to the Devil). Awesomenocity to the max.

Tony Myles has an interesting take on this : http://postmodernbf.blogspot.com/2006/03/today-is-day.html (read through to Scene 4)

And then later with his second son : http://dontcallmeveronica.blogspot.com/2007/07/celebration-of-freedom.html

its definitely a funny observation. Its not new. early christians used Roman military language in many rituals and liturgy.

so awesome!

Our men's ministry hasn't done a war-themed study yet, but they have done fighter pilots…that's pretty close.

Me and a buddy are starting a men's ministry. We're both military, (he's an officer cadet, and I'm a NCM) And we're talkin about showing Pride and Prejudice…

Is that okay for a Guy's night?

We want to present an image of strong, eloquent, excellent men.